Getting Brave!!!

So Thursday I did it...I called Acadia OB/GYN and made an appointment for a consultation! March 18th we will meet with Dr. Bretta and get the ball rolling!

I was instantly excited. Any fear was gone and replaced with an "OMG, we're actually doing this." I instantly text Jen & her mom. Both very excited. Facebooked Jen who actually text me then called me because she couldn't wait to hear the news. She's very supportive right now!

Now I have even more drive to exercise and eat right!

So, I made the near perfect birthday cake for Lillie. Spongebob...I did awesome...it was like I was channelling Mom to get every character perfect! Her party was interesting...many awkward moments...and like always Lillie came back to Norridgewock with us!

We had an ok night. Jen's little snips are really getting to me. When I call her on it, she gets pissed. Her mom said she's just like her dad. As the night when on she got worse. Then she, Pete and Michelle went out to smoke...that's when I decided it was time for bed. I don't care if she only does it once in a while...I don't like it! NEVER WILL! Today Jen was hungover and sick as a dog...karma is all I have to say. I love her dearly but I can't love that. I can't feel bad for something she does to herself. I refuse to baby her...she's on her own.

On the flip side...there was a lot of baby talk this weekend. We threw out all kinds of names...Jacoby, Harrison, (Oh, Green Bay just won the Super Bowl)...for girls Madison, Madeline, Peyton. We even joked about Peyton Lynda (like Painting Lynda...which of course Jen ran with...we can spell it P-A-I-N-T-I-N-G...weirdo!).

So I have a day of detox ahead of me. I started the day off right...Fiber One Bar and Coffee knowing we were going to Mei Lee Gardens for lunch. I had 2 fingers, 1/2 egg roll, rice, a wing and a rangoon. By about 1:30-2 I had enough gas to fuel a bus. I had another finger, egg roll, 2 rangoons and some rice for supper and again, I was explosive. Then I topped it all off with ice cream. Tomorrow is all about salad, oatmeal, V8, and veg...plus 1 hour or more of cardio. I'm glad yucky food is making me feel yucky...my body is adjusting to good food!

Well, Jen's off to Portland in the morning, I have a car for 2 days, it's suppose to snow again Tuesday...auditions start tomorrow but are all messed up thanks to basketball tournaments...and I have NO help! I am not looking forward to this week at all!

Think Positive....

So, I admit, I can be a pessimist...nah, more of a worrier. So, when it all boils down, I am worried I won't get pregnant. BUT THEN, I turn it all around and daydream and smile about that little bundle of joy I'll be holding. THEN I read something about weight, diet, nutrition, exercise, age verse fertility and get bummed out. BUT THEN I think of all the over 35 women who've successfully conceived and I visualize what pregnancy and birth will be like.

STAY FOCUSED!

I've had an awesome week thus far. Exercised twice on Monday & today, a brief cardio stint Tuesday morning, switched a salad for the fries at CPG last night and salad for tortillas at lunch today. This goal weight is in sight and I'm read to rock a new body and vessel for my child.

Next step, call the OB/GYN...I'm so nervous only because I don't know what to ask for. I guess I can be up front about that when I call. Once that call is over and that appointment is made, I'll be on the road to mommyhood!

Jen's mom continues to say how honored she is to do this for us. However, she is very hard on Jen and that's tough because I can see where she's coming from but I know Jen will rise to the occasion. I do however, know how Jen can be and I really don't need the stress of her more angry moments especially during a pregnancy. I may have to have that chat with her.

Well, 4 great days of cardio and healthy eating...my body will be ready before I know it!